Departures
by Theodore Hawkwood
Summary: Ted tries, unsuccessfully, to leave the Halliwell Manor without waking up Paige. Unfortunately Shipwreck’s hijinks ensure he wakes up the entire Manor...CharmedMisfitverse Xover.


**Departures**

**Disclaimer: This little one-shot came to mind when I was driving down the road listening to the radio. I don't own the Charmed series, X-men Evolution, or G.I. Joe so for God's sake don't sue me. I'm not sure where to put this in my AU Charmed/Misfitverse timeline. I'd say I'll put this after the fic Meet the Incredibles.** **To regular Misfitverse readers, I promise I'll get back to Facility Kronos, but I've got a massive case of writer's block and a couple one-shots that wouldn't go away. **

**WARNING, extreme silliness around the midpoint of this story...**

Summary: Ted tries, unsuccessfully, to leave the Halliwell Manor without waking up Paige. Unfortunately Shipwreck's hijinks ensure he wakes up the entire Manor...Charmed/Misfitverse X-over.

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Ted slipped gently out of the covers. _Three days already passed, and it feels so short._ He thought as Paige stirred, one bare shoulder and most of her back exposed to the air.

He slid the covers back up to under her chin, gently kissing her cheek. Paige gave a contented sigh and a sleepy smile.

Ted threw on his clothes and had just put on one boot when Paige spoke up, "Leaving so soon?"

"Yeah." Ted replied, "Unfortunately duty calls."

"It's four-thirty." Paige replied, sitting up, pulling the covers to her chest.

"Yeah, but we have morning PT (Physical Training) at five." Ted replied, "Roadblock's been pretty insistent about that point lately."

"I could orb you over there." Paige offered.

"That's kind of you sweetheart, but I was trying not to wake you up when I left." Ted replied.

"Why?" Paige replied, "You don't want to say good-bye?"

"No, that's not it." Ted replied, "It's just that it's early and I didn't want to wake you."

"Well, tucking me in and kissing me is definitely going to wake me up..." Paige replied.

"If you want me to quit doing that..." Ted began.

"No, no, no." Paige replied, sliding out of bed and grabbing her night shirt from off the floor, "I love it when you do that."

"And I love doing it for you." Ted replied, walking up to Paige and taking her in his arms. Paige looked so irresistible, clad in one of his shirts, which went down just under a third of the way down her thighs.

"Whenever you have to leave you always wait till I'm asleep." Paige began, "Why?"

Ted noticed the slightly hurt undertone in Paige's voice, "I'd always had a hard time with goodbyes, whenever I had to leave to do anything. It's caused more than a few relationships I've had to go bad."

Paige replied, "Ted, I'm just an orb or Mass Device away."

"I know, sweetie, I know. But sometimes its so hard to say goodbye." Ted replied, "Knowing how much I'm gonna miss you."

Paige took the final half step closer, putting her arms around Ted, "I'll miss you too."

"You know the strangest thing," Ted replied, "This place is actually starting to feel like home to me. I'll even find myself missing this place, and most importantly you."

"That's good. But I think I've got the solution to our missing each other problem." Paige replied, Her hand wandered up his chest to just over his heart. Paige took Ted's other hand with her free hand and put it over her heart.

Paige's eyes closed as a soft glow appeared over their heads and Ted felt a warm feeling, almost like being rocked as an infant. "Wh-what are you doing?" Ted asked.

Paige didn't answer for a while until the glow descended upon them both. "Whoa..." Ted exclaimed, feeling woozy.

"It's a version of the link that Whitelighters have with their charges. That's how we can feel our charges, no matter where they are in the world." Paige replied.

"It's like I can feel your emotions." Ted replied.

"And I can feel yours." Paige replied, "That way we're always in each others hearts, no matter where we are."

Ted gently kissed the tip of her nose, followed by her lips. "I wish you didn't have to go." Paige said.

"Me too." Ted replied, "I'll call you as soon as I can."

"OK. Just don't be afraid of waking me up to say goodby next time." Paige replied.

"Well, let me tuck you in and get going." Ted replied, "I'd rather not hear Roadblock yell at me in rhyme for showing up late." Ted replied.

Paige smiled and let go, "Well I'll let you get going and..."

"SHIPWRECK!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE!!!" Piper shouted and a sudden explosion sounded.

"Shipwreck?" Ted replied, "Come on, let's go get Shipwreck before Piper kills him."

"You might be too late." Paige mused.

"OW! OW! OW! EASY LADY! OW!" Shipwreck shouted.

Ted charged down the hall with Paige behind him as they opened the door to see Shipwreck standing in the bedroom wearing only his sailor hat and a pair of boxer shorts. Piper was currently chasing him around the room with a high heeled shoe. Leo was trying, unsuccessfully, to keep Piper from beating up on Shipwreck.

"Shipwreck? What on earth are you doing here, without your clothes?" Ted asked.

"Uh that's a long story, Mountaineer." Shipwreck replied.

"Let me guess, you got drunk again..." Ted replied.

"Well, let's just say Torpedo Juice packs quite a wallop." Shipwreck replied.

"I'LL SHOW YOU A WALLOP YOU DRUNKEN JACKASS!!!" Piper shouted, "LEO LEGGO!!!"

"Piper, try and be civil, it was an honest mistake." Leo replied.

"So Shipwreck, before Piper kills you, please explain why you're in here at four-thirty in your underwear? Preferably before I have to put your remains in a doggie bag." Ted replied.

"Well I was drinking Torpedo Juice with some of my buddies at P3..." Shipwreck replied.

"We don't even make anything called Torpedo Juice!" Piper replied.

"Uh, let's just say a couple of your bartenders learned Shipwreck's Torpedo Juice recipe..." Shipwreck replied, "And let's say she was _very_ sympathetic to a divorced single father of you catch my drift..."

"Wow." Paige replied, "Shipwreck, you continue to amaze me."

"How did you lose your clothes again?" Ted replied.

"Uh, let's just say her boyfriend chased me down the fire-escape and around the neighborhood with a hammer?" Shipwreck replied.

"Who was the girl again?" Paige asked.

"Her name was Joanna, or Josephine or something..." Shipwreck said, "I was a bit too drunk to remember."

"Did she wake up screaming by any chance?" Piper replied.

"No, we were...uhm...and then Mr. Hammer breaks into the room and starts chasing me all over the place..." Shipwreck said.

"He isn't following you, is he?" Piper asked.

"Nah, I think I lost him somewhere downtown and..." Shipwreck began.

CRASH! BASH!

The sound of a hammer smashing a window could be heard from downstairs. "Uh oh."

Shipwreck headed downstairs. "Where do you think you're going?" Piper demanded.

"It's time to settle it like a Navy-man." Shipwreck said, "I was trying to avoid doing it the sailor way, but now this idiot's left me no choice."

"YOU!" Marcus Cowle, the hammer wielding boyfriend shouted as he broke into the Manor.

"PREPARE TO EAT KNUCKLES!" Shipwreck began.

"SHIPWRECK YOU ARE DEAD!" Piper shouted.

CRASH! SMASH! BAM! WWHACK! WHUMP! The sound of furniture breaking, glass shattering, and drywall caving in could be heard.

Ted sighed and pulled his cell phone out, "Roadblock, I might be late. I've gotta prevent a double homicide..."

"Wait? What!?" Roadblock asked on the other side of the line.

"Well, long story short, Shipwreck got drunk, hooked up with this girl..." Ted began.

"Please tell me you're joking, Shipwreck hooked up with a girl? Was she drunk enough to give Shipwreck a whirl?" Roadblock replied.

WHAM! WHACK! WHUMP! SMASH!

"OW! MERCY MERCY!" Marcus Cowle shouted as Shipwreck proceeded to beat up on him.

"JOANNA DESERVES BETTER THAN YOU YOU HOOK NOSED CRETIN!!!" Shipwreck shouted.

"Well, he's now beating up her pissed off boyfriend, and Piper's trying to kill him for teleporting into the house wearing only his boxers." Ted replied, "So I'm gonna be late."

"Mountaineer, I've heard every excuse for God's sake. But this one takes the cake." Roadblock said, "I'll get the others and bail Shipwreck out."

"At this rate you'll need the Rangers to save Shipwreck from the Wrath of Piper." Ted replied.

"So much for avoiding waking me up." Paige smirked.

"Yeah, I know. To be fair, it was Shipwreck who woke up Piper..." Ted replied, "At least the boys didn't wake up from all the chaos."

"Having demons coming in here, not to mention the X-men and Misfits now they're kinda..." Paige began.

Wyatt and Chris could be heard wailing from the next room. "I guess I spoke too soon." Ted replied.

"Ted, next time you get a three day pass, could you please take Paige somewhere or try to prevent Shipwreck from putting in appearances?" Leo asked as he headed downstairs to prevent the double homicide.

"Maybe I could visit you next time." Paige said, "I haven't been over there in ages."

"That's a good thing..." Ted replied.

SMASH! CRASH!

"At this rate the Halliwell Manor's gonna sound like Misfit Manor anyway." Ted observed.

"Why do I get the feeling that the girl Shipwreck's fighting about is familiar..." Paige began and then promptly said, "Oh no, one of my charges is involved with Shipwreck? Maybe that's why she needs my guidance."

"If she's crazy enough to sleep with Shipwreck then I think she's fargone...ow..." Ted replied as Paige elbowed him in the ribs.

"So much for quiet departures." Ted groaned as the rest of the Misfits teleported into the Manor.

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END


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